Remember me when you're out walking, when snow falls high outside your door, late at night when you're not sleeping and moonlight falls across your floor... when I can't hurt you anymore...

This, too, shall pass...

I'm having a rough day today... holy shit.  It's quarter to midnight, and it just continues to get worse and worse.  And I know a lot of it is because I keep thinking... subconsciously.

Today would have been my dear friend Amber's 24th birthday.  We lost her almost 2 years ago to brain cancer.  And I miss her dearly... every day...

It's like, when you're having a really shitty day, and you had that one person that you could rely on to make the world seem just a little brighter?  That was AmHo. She was so full of life and love.  She was truly, honestly, one of the best friends I could've ever asked for.  She was like a sister.  And I never got to say goodbye.  I never was able to tell her exactly what she meant to me.  I know that she knew, but it's just so hard to let that go.  I should've been there for her.  And I wasn't.

On top of this, I had to break the trust of one of the girls at work, and make a mandated report.  And she is now furious with me. 

And if that wasn't enough... as I'm writing this, the song that was played at my friend Brad's funeral just came on, and now I've burst into tears. 

I think I need to go home... to New York... for a visit.  I need to see friends and family.  I need to feel that energy from them.  I just need a chance to reset.

I'm getting to the point in my life when the monotony starts to take hold.  I want a new job.  I want to move away from this city.  I want out. 

I've got a gypsy soul and a hippie mindset.

Tell someone you love them, for you never know when it will be the last chance to.

-R.